Becoming Unflappable and untethered
“There is nothing more important to true growth than realizing that you are not the voice of the mind - you are the one who hears it… Only you can take inner freedom away from yourself, or give it to yourself. Nobody else can.” - Michael Singer
“The cold is your friend.” - Wim Hof
This is part lll of the hair restoration journey posts. You may wonder what service has to do with hair restoration. Well, your hair health is dependent on your whole health. Your whole health is dependent on your mental health. Your mental health is dependent on community and security and your inner world being aligned.
Sikhs have a long history of service and meditation going hand in hand (balance of inner and outer world). Doing something meaningful and kind for others has physiological benefits. We are social creature and rely on acts of empathy and kindness for survival - our brains and bodies have built in mechanisms to reward altruistic behaviors. You will get all sorts of happy chemicals if you do good for others. It will also take you out of yourself.
Being self absorbed is bad for your health. It will make you insecure and boring and even sick. I used to be so anxious that every little thing was a slight or unbearable obstacle.
It’s important to not confuse yourself with the voice in your head. You are the awareness that notices the voice. Thoughts and feelings are information, they are not facts. You can choose to circumvent them and think and act differently than you have been doing thus far.
You can over come your default setting (Default Mode Network).
Meditation, breath work, and cold exposure have been the most effective methods for me in my own inner exploration.
By employing the methods below, I have been able to regulate my mood and appetite and sleep schedule. I am truly a healthier person for it. I’ve been doing the Wim Hof breathing method for about a year and half and have been meditating off and on for about 10 + years. I fell off the wagon a few years ago but started up again and noticed the effects right away.
I don’t fall into negative spirals as often and can pull myself out faster.
I heal faster.
I’m also just a better person because now I have energy to serve and do and explore whereas I used to just be exhausted by my own emotions.
Once I really internalized that I was the one choosing to hold on to negativity and that I could let it go, I felt so empowered. This practice takes time to learn, but your mind will get better at doing it - relaxing and letting go.
These tools will not make your life easier, it will make you stronger.
My routine:
I wake up and do Wim Hof breathing - at least one round (30 breaths and one breath hold)
I drink water, sometime with salt and lemon in the morning to wake up my body and replenish the water and electrolytes lost in my sleep.
I sometimes eat a light breakfast of fruits and nuts or eggs and toast with some kombucha or water. No juice. I also try and avoid dairy in the mornings because of the high tryptophan and fat content. Although fat is good for you and tryptophan helps in serotonin production and release, dairy can make you sleepy and I can’t have that in the morning.
Dairy is best for evenings or just before a nap. There’s a reason babies chug milk and then knock right out. Save yourself some struggle and don’t do dairy when you need to be alert.
I do 1 round (10 minutes) of kriya yoga on my drive to work. Here’s a guided version.
I try and stay mindful of my breathing at work and stand up, stretch and go for short walks whenever I get the chance. Keeping death in mind helps. It might sound morbid but death gives life meaning. So be grateful you got to steal a little more time from the grave today and find something to savor. It will make the little grudges and frustration fade because up against death, nothing really matters.
I eat lunch every day. Usually salad or a sandwich or pasta. I’ve been trying to balance my meals as much as possible but this is still a struggle for me. I’m lucky to work just a few blocks away from a local Co-Op so can get healthy options there. Again, I try and avoid heavy foods and dairy or anything loaded in sugar.
I usually need a nap around 2 so I will close my eyes and breath through my nose and exhale through my mouth for a few minutes to relax and remove myself from screens.
It’s important to just relax and slow down when you can. Life is always telling you to speed up but if you don’t slow down, you won’t get to savor it. And you’ll be too tired to really care. Just sit and observe. Or listen to soothing music. Just take a beat for yourself. Work will always be there.
After work, I try and go for a walk (sometimes with a friend), jog, work out with free weights and resistance bands or play a sport for at least 10-45 minutes. I skip some days if I’m just too tired but I try and find some time because it re-energizes me.
It’s also fun to just put on some bangers and dance. Dance is definitely exercise.
I then take a shower. I do my scalp massage and then for the last 30 seconds to a minute of the shower, I turn the temp ice cold. The shock from this is a meditation in itself. It pulls me into myself. I have to remember to relax even with the mild stress the cold is exerting. It gets easier every time but is always a struggle. I get an immediate burst of happy chemicals and a deep satisfaction of having handled the discomfort with grace.
This daily practice will train your brain to not sweat mild discomforts. I’ve been able to handle anxiety much better due to it.
I now take ice baths every now and then which are even more rewarding than the showers. The reduction of inflammation and increase in health benefits is palpable. It even makes it easier to fall asleep afterwards. And good sleep is a super power. It’s when your body repairs and replenishes. It’s essential to good health and well-being. Never skimp on sleep.
I try and be done with dinner and take my vitamins before 6:30 so my body has time to digest and relax before bed.
I try and make time for art or family time.
I do my skin/hair care routine and try and read a bit before bed so my eyes are not getting the blue light from screens.
Then I try and be asleep by 10:30 at the latest. Usually in bed by 9:40.
I do a night time meditation and read some Sikh Hymns.
I get thrown off the routine every now and then but this is what I strive for. I make regular lists and note things in my calendar to make sure I can be efficient and have time for the important things.
I used to meditate for hours a day but that wasn’t sustainable as my life got more busy and hectic. These small steps give me a daily routine I can manage. The consistency is what gives this routine strength.
And then of course, I try and do something kind for someone else once a day. It can honestly be as simple as having a thoughtful conversation where you listen more than you speak. Or helping someone with the dishes.
I also love working at the farmer’s market and house-sitting. Caring for farmers, small local businesses and animals grounds me and makes my work feel meaningful. It builds community. Community and kindness can keep you healthy. Let the negative stuff go.
Note:
Please know that I’m not a medical professional and all these things are not me prescribing anything. They’re just things that worked for me and I hope you can find some use out of them. But know your own body and limits and consult a doctor before doing any cold exposure so you know your heart can take it. Never force your body beyond its limits.
Take care and may good things come your way!
Love,
Gia
P.S. Reading list:
The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer
The benefits of meditation:
